danihell

i bought a loaf of bread at whole foods yesterday and i was so tempted to post a photo of it and say THIS SHIT IS AMAZING but then i became real self-conscious remembering how one of my roommates at Lang would literally write down the foods that i bought that she was interested in trying/purchasing for herself. 

also this girl LITERALLY rubbed her tummy while watching me and friends enjoy a pizza without her. 

1. Elliot, aka heylucifer has now made a second appearance in dreamland! First teaching me how to sew and this time we were partying and (i think?) making out! alright!!!

2. I am now a Casting Associate for a Comedy Central TV Show. The gig doesn’t start for another week but I’m pretty excited.

3. At the dog park today a pit bull mix was running back and forth along the fence that separates the little dog park from the big dog park. A bunch of people at the little dog park got pissed cuz they interpreted it as hunting behavior so an old(ish) lady gave the dog’s hipstery owner a firm talking to and the guy just crossed his arms and acted defensive. It was clear that the dog ruled the house and the guy didn’t know how to train him. I love pit bulls and other big dogs and I would never blame the dog for being a dog - but if you’re going to adopt a dog like that you NEED to fucking TRAIN THEM. The dog wouldn’t respond to its owner and it was really awkward because it basically validated what the old lady was trying to tell the guy. 

4. Yesterday I had this arthritic 11 year old staffordshire bull terrier at my house for dog sitting and him and Jennifer got INTO IT. They were both sniffing the floor for crumbs and then ran into each other. He freaked out so Jennifer reacted and I had to rip him off of her. It was really scary but she’s totally fine. I grabbed his collar and pulled him away saying NOOOO ! NO NO NO!, let him go, scooped up Jennifer and shut ourselves in the bathroom so I could check her for injuries. She was shaking and I felt so terrible for letting that beast in the house. Then I got over it and so did she and I dropped him back off at his house and told his owner that I couldn’t have him at my place anymore. It was a difficult conversation to have because I hate confrontation but she totally understood and took it well.

5. I’m reading a book called The Passionate Marriage and I think it’s really helpful for anyone in a long term, committed relationship. Helps you understand sex on a different level - once two people have become emotionally fused, navigating the tricky field of differentiation. It talks about sex in a way that I’ve never really encountered. Most books that talk about orgasm and sex-positive stuff stress communication and focusing on sensations —-but it’s just not that simple. I like how much emphasis the author puts on EMOTIONS in a sexual relationship and how as those emotions change, the sex life changes. Pretty fascinating /informative/ helpful stuff. HIGHLY RECOMMEND.

62, now 63, people either reblogged or liked this recipe. srsly?

undressedskeleton:

This is one of my favorite snacks! I like making these before long hikes or trips to the gym! It’s full of protein and healthy fats to keep my body strong and energized. 

1/4 Slice of Large Celery Stalk!
60 Calories
6g Fat
3g Protein
7g Carbs 

whatshouldwecallme:

I FINALLY got my side view mirror replaced. Every man at the damn Toyota dealership felt it appropriate to comment on my weather inappropriate outfit. I went on a walk this morning in sweatpants and it felt warm enough for shorts so I wore them but apparently wearing shorts when it is less than 60 out is a major faux pas at the Glendale Toyota dealership. My god, SO many people commented on it!

Wearing shorts when it’s chilly is the new _____________.

I grab Jennifer’s little face and look her in the eyes and kiss her on the lips and say “you are my baby! I love you so much!” every single day. If I were to ever get another tattoo, it would be in her honor. Perhaps Jennifer, written in a handwriting that I think she’d have if she could write, on my stomach, where she most likes to be pet.

Is doing a juice cleanse easier or the same as the master cleanse? I’m not excited by food right now. I had too much good food over the weekend while Karen was in town. Dr Weil recommends fasting one day a week. Maybe I’ll do a juice fast to get excited by food again.

Nope. I’d do it to lose weight. Let’s not kid ourselves!

rolled my ankle at a gas station in highland park and shouted FUCK , limped away avoiding eye contact with everyone there.

interviewed to personal assist a very established tv/film writer only a year my senior. hope i get it. 

took the dog i get paid to walk on a walk and he was a stubborn mule, refusing to go back inside when my time was up. he’s too old and smart to be lured by treats. i have no emotional connection to this dog.

had a dream Elliot taught me how to sew. 

fell asleep watching the Mike Tyson documentary and felt (VERY STRANGELY) attracted to him. felt weird about it in the morning!

in college i went through a phase where the only way i could stay awake during this extremely boring media studies history of the satellite class was to bring a lunch to snack on the whole time. i’d make a veggie burger sandwich on sprouted grain overflowing with raw sauerkraut (people must’ve thought it was so gross and stinky but at the time i was clueless) and i’d also bring an enormous grapefruit. the proper picking and peeling of the grapefruit would take a very, very long time and cover up the sauerkraut stench in the small classroom. i can’t believe the professor never told me to quit it with the food. it was SUCH A SMALL ROOM! i’m so embarrassed thinking about it! 

also, olivia palermo (from The City) was in that class too. she’d sip perrier or pellegrino with a straw and sometimes eat peanut m&ms (if i remember correctly) also sometimes she’d have a diet pop. she was bored too i’m sure. 

i’m really hooked on this website right now: http://www.thedaysofyore.com/

i think if i were to one day achieve the success that it takes to be profiled on there and they asked the question, when did you know you wanted to be a writer?

 i’d DEFINITELY mention how i would re-write babysitter’s club stories when i was a kid and in them the girls would be all jacked up on drugs and having abortions and stuff and  i took such great pleasure in writing those things - but then i showed one story to my older sister Lauren and she was really mean about it and told me not to write that kind of crap. her saying that really set me off track for a number of years!